isaiah 25- (somehow he is still here)

Tonight I was laying on the ground talking with my sisters. My one sister was talking about how lately she has been feeling uncharacteristically overwhelmed. My older sister nodded in understanding, "Weary is how I would say I feel." 
I nodded. "Yesterday was the best day of my whole month, and it was the day my grandma died." 

I am weary. 
Most days I am exhausted beyond comprehension. I wake up tired and spent no matter how much sleep I get. 
Yesterday, my grandma passed away after two arduous weeks in hospice, after a stroke. Before this happened I had texted my ex-boyfriend, asking to talk so I could get the peace and closure I needed to move on in a healthy, complete way. To complicate matters, while I'm still sorting out this ex-boyfriend problem, I started to develop feelings for someone new.
I am also confronting the decision to attend school out of state or to remain home. 
Add a full load of classes and a job to this pile, and you have the perfect recipe for utter exhaustion. Weariness. 
Confusion.
I wish this was going in a positive direction. I wish I could wrap this up nicely with a little bow about getting the closure I need, falling madly in love with the perfect guy and knowing exactly where I should spend the next two years of my college career. 
Truth is, I do not have any of those things. 
I am in the middle of this chasm and things are dark and hazy. 
My legs feel like they're about to give out under me and everyone I trust is far above me, calling out directions and advice that become indistinct echoes by the time it reaches me. 

But God remains even in this. 
Isaiah 25 says,"You have been a refuge for the poor,
a refuge for the needy in their distress,a shelter from the storm    and a shade from the heat. For the breath of the ruthless is like a storm driving against a wall  and like the heat of the desert." 
I am holding on to this. He is my refuge. My shelter from the storm. 


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